Theme the First: Foreign Legion!!!

I've decided that when I have a theme to work with I'm going to write a post sharing my thoughts and any relevant (or irrelevant, as the mood strikes) research/background info.

Well, folks, the first theme has been hat-picked and has come up Foreign Legion!  Thanks again to Mr. X for providing the themes and the hat into which they are placed.  Thanks to my fingers for alighting upon the paper that read "Foreign Legion".  And thanks to you, reader/s, for.... um.... your literacy?  Unless someone is reading this aloud to you, in which case you're probably blind or mildly stupid, either of which would be a reasonable cause of the shame that sent so many men to the Legion.  (Allow me to clarify for those without a sense of humor: I'm kidding.)  (To those with a sense of humor: I'm not kidding.  I think illiterates should be forced to pit-fight seeing-eye dogs whose owners are lead into busy traffic.)

Before I did any research on this theme, I had a vague notion of the Foreign Legion.  I knew, for instance, that Pepe Lepew had been a member in a few classic Warner cartoons.  You might be surprised to know just how much history and classical music knowledge I've gleaned from cartoons over the years.  When I say "gleaned", of course I mean "assumed without fact-checking".  In any case, the Legion was good enough for Pepe, so it's good enough for me.  I also vaguely remembered the Legion as a critical element of an old Marty Feldman spoof titled "The Last Remake of Beau Geste" that I enjoyed in a "poor man's Monty Python" sort of way.  This prompted in my brain a recognition that undoubtedly one, if not more, of my movies would be an adaptation of the original Beau Geste novel, which I know by reputation as very British and adventure-y in the manner of Lawrence of Arabia.  I really hope the similarities end there as (sorry, film historians/critics/professors) I find Lawrence dreadfully tedious.

I Wikipedia'd "Foreign Legion" (because library research is classified by the Geneva Convention as, and I quote, "Stupid and boring and stuff") and was surprised to discover that the term "Foreign Legion" actually applies to a division of several national militaries.  Officially there are an Israeli, Russian, and Spanish Foreign Legion in addition to the original French.  I thought I remembered from Pepe that the Foreign Legion was a predominantly French phenomenon, and further research into the subject confirmed that memory.

You can Wiki this for yourself and spare a few moments, but then you'll miss my amusing summary and why else have you started reading this blog if not for the thrill of my prose?  Here's my basic breakdown of the French Foreign Legion:

1) It was created in 1831 by King Louis Phillippe because some powerful Frenchman before him (undoubtedly a man sans military pragmatism and avec too much esprit nationale) had decided that foreigners couldn't fight in the French army.  I'm not going to make an obvious anti-France joke here because a) it's beneath me  b) they were all made by jingoists 10 years ago  and c) I love the romanticism of period French military culture.  Cyrano?  The Musketeers?  Monte Cristo (the character, not the sandwich)?  Sign me up.

2) For the majority of its history, la legion provided the front-line foot-soldiers in major skirmishes for colonization.  See, nobody in provincial France actually wanted these foreigners to live near them, just to die for them so that France could expand its borders.  The first major skirmish involving la legion was in Algeria, which eventually became the Legion's adopted home and is what most people picture when they hear the term French Foreign Legion.  Again, I have to believe that Pepe is partially responsible for this.

3) Because of the loose membership requirements of la legion's early years, it's viewed somewhat romantically as being a haven for criminals on the run and deeply troubled but noble men escaping from life's many woes.  The difficult living conditions and years of fighting in foreign lands have only added to this romanticism, leading many storytellers to create the manliest and bravest heroes alongside the most wicked, vile villains.  Membership requirements throughout the years have tightened as the world has become more globally conscious, which may account for the rapid loss of its romantic appeal and relegation to fictional obsolescence.

So there you go.  There's the French Foreign Legion in a nutshell.

And as I guessed, the first surprise film that I shall review next week is the 1939 Gary Cooper-starring Beau Geste.  See you here again some time next week!